NFL Power Rankings

Before we break into week 10 and the new Thursday games that await us, it’s a great time to do some power rankings to see exactly how all the NFL teams stack up.

Glad we don’t have to count on the Packers being for real. Way to let the Bucs get their first win in the cream-sickle unis Green Bay.

Offensive Tackle might be a high priority in the draft next season for the Pack I’m thinking. . . just wanted to venture a guess.

As usual, you’re always welcome to give us hell for this on the show. . . The Fantasy Exchange

1. Indianapolis Colts (8-0) It’s time to kick the tires and light the fires this Sunday. Patriots/Colts, Brady/Manning, in the timeless battle that never stops. Injuries Shminjuries, Peyton Manning can flat-out score on anybody.

2. New England Patriots (6-2) Sure I may be repetitive but this coming Sunday night is going to be ####ing epic. The Power of the Bundchen going up against The Pedigree of the Manning. Straight butter!

3. Pittsburgh Steelers (6-2) The Samoan and his mullet of disaster are simply too much for opposing offenses to rival. He seems to be everywhere on the field at once or maybe it’s just the hair. And, YES, I asked with my eyes.

4. New Orleans Saints (8-0) I know Saints fans hate me but what are they doing letting sub-par teams build leads on them? Don’t say trying to keep things interesting either. They don’t have me fooled.

5. Minnesota Vikings (7-1) It goes without saying that Jared Allen has the 2nd most-viscous mullet in professional sports behind Polomalu. Combined w/ the Silver Fox, the Vikings have a lot going for them.

6. Cincinnati Bengals (6-2) It’s not too late. There’s still room on the Bounce Back Bengals Band Wagon. Carson, Esteban OchcoCinco, and now Ced Ben is the centerpiece. Where the heck are my Estrada sun-glasses?

7. Arizona Cardinals (5-3) Which Cardinals team shows up on Sunday is the real question but I’m liking this defense and IF they ever get all of their top-flight WRs healthy, we’re talking about one of the best offenses in the business.

8. Dallas Cowboys (6-2) Another case of which team will show up but with the Cowboys and Tony Romo, it’s more of a “Which Team Will Show Up in the Playoffs?” kind of question. Has my Miles Austin T-Shirt arrived in the mail yet?

9. Atlanta Falcons (5-3) I know they’re way too up-&-down but Matty Ice is still young and with a running game like that, they’ll always be in games. DeAngelo Hall seriously needs to turn off the haters, you were a bust dude.

10. Houston Texans (5-4) The Owen Daniels’ injury hurts the offense but this is still a very strong team w/ the defense finally coming to form. Schaub still has Andre the Giant, so expect them to make a wild-card.

11. Denver Broncos (6-2) It was good while it lasted but this defense has a weakness and that’s not being able to stop the no-huddle. McCheese, Orton, and his neck beard are wearing out their welcome in Denver.

12. Philadelphia Eagles (5-3) Not sure when the real Eagles will show up but this is a playoff team with a lot of talent if they can get their act together. They need to get DeSean Jackson more involved on offense.

13. New York Giants (5-4) Sloppy football in both phases of the game is what knocked the G-Men out of the top-10 for me. Their secondary is atrocious and their play-calling on offense isn’t much better.

14. San Diego Chargers (5-3) Phillip Rivers will continue to keep them in games but the defense is starting to show signs of life. If they could get the same out of Tomlinson, this team could be a contender in the playoffs.

15. Baltimore Ravens (4-4) I’m guessing they got up too high for the Broncos game and couldn’t sustain it? They’ve got to be the best .500% team in the league but they still need more from their WR corps.

16. New York Jets (4-4) Talk about another team that’s better than its record. Maybe if their coach was as good as he is loud, they’d have more wins but I still love the way they run the ball. There’s still hope here as long as they keep Bart Scott away from penalty flags.

17. Chicago Bears (4-4) The defense isn’t what it used to be but at least the offense is starting to pickup the pace a little. Cutler and the boys are still developing chemistry but it won’t matter if they miss the playoffs.

18. Miami Dolphins (3-5) I’m placing this team away in the 2010 file, as I expect big things next season. Chad Henne is still finding his way and while he’s got a bright future, Miami just isn’t there yet.

19. Green Bay Packers (4-4) Tampa Bay? WTF? Things can’t get much worse for Green Bay, so expect them to bounce back with a big game with the Mike McCarthy’s job essentially dangling from a string at this point.

20. San Francisco 49ers (3-5) I expected a lot better from these guys when considering their running game, talent level, and coaching. They should not be under .500% but this group is somehow managing to underachieve.

21. Jacksonville Jaguars (4-4) Perhaps pocket Hercules is enough to help get a team to the playoffs. While he is a fantasy football super-star, MJD can’t play defense and the Jaguars still can’t stop the pass.

22. Carolina Panthers (3-5) Somehow Noodle Arm is still an active QB and much to the dismay of Panther fans, he’s going to continue starting because Carolina simply doesn’t have a better option. Biscuit Justice WTF?

23. Seattle Seahawks (3-5) The up-&-down season of Seattle continues w/ the erratic passing of Matt Hasselcrap and a patch-work offensive line. The Seahags aren’t going anywhere this season but there’s hope on defense with super rookie LB Aaron Curry.

24. Buffalo Bills (3-5) I really like what they’ve been doing on defense despite all of their injuries but having no offensive line is hindering their ability to stay in games. Maybe they stayed at a Holiday Inn Express during the bye week?

25. Tennessee Titans (2-6) The best doggone 2-6 team out there. I’m now convinvced that they took the time machine back to ’82 w/ Uncle Rico to find Vince Young’s missing mojo that was lost after the ’06 Rose Bowl. At least Jeff Fisher has a sense of humor about it.

26. Washington Redskins (2-6) Sure they are a joke of a franchise but their defense is actually showing signs of like. If they can manage to sustain a few drives, they might win another few games. I miss Clinton Portis and his costumes.

27. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (1-7) Wow! A quarterback is born. The rookie out of K-State has a legit arm and he’s decent scrambler. The Bucs caught a lot of flak for the pick but now look to prove the doubters wrong.

28. Kansas City Chiefs (1-7) The mighty Matt Cassel with his band of rag-tags and crusty rejects are looking better by the week but that won’t be translating into wins anytime soon. Good riddance to bad rubbish w/ LJ.

29. Oakland Raiders (2-6) Psycho coach, psycho owner, and psycho fans. Why isn’t this working again? It doesn’t look to get much better for Raider Fans, outside of their soon to be top-5 draft pick in April.

30. Detroit Lions (1-7) They are no longer the worst team in the league but not by much. The Lions actually jumped out to a 17 pt lead on the Seahags but failed to capitalize. It is getting better. . . marginally better.

31. St. Louis Rams (1-7) I love owning James Laurinaitis in my IDP leagues because with the Rams being so terrible on offense, their defense is on the field all day long. Get ready for another spanking courtesy of the Saints.

32. Cleveland Browns (1-7) It isn’t easy for Mangenius to swallow these losses but I know he feels, being a Hopelessly Dellusional Irrational Notre Dame Football Fan. Maybe he should punch one of Labron’s friends and get traded out of town for good.